The Blogtastic Blogfest That Is Getmeoutofthis.net!

Hi, everyone! I’m a blogger! I blog everyday! (HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Just kidding, I continue to be a failure.)

Anyway.

I think it’s interesting that my response to feeling monetary pressure is to feel amazing urges to buy people gifts. Like, I’m feeling a lot of monetary pressure right now. Kohl’s sucks, I’m not making near enough money to pay rent, etc, much less, you know, relax and have a good time, and that plus my medical bills are eating through all the money I had saved up for the summer during the semester real quick-like. I’ve been kinda panicking.

And then I, you know, realize I really need to start buying presents for people. Cara and Chris and all kinds of people. Presents! Presents. Exciting.

I mean, I like buying presents! I regret nothing, and it’s not like I’ve spent a lot of money. I’ve not been insane. But it’s still pretty silly of me, I guess.

Coping mechanisms, like buying presents or hiding from a blog or a project I’m supposed to be working on, are really dumb, I guess is what I’m trying to say.

I like the idea of working out more. I mean, I do. I like the idea of not being so easily winded, and just having a little more all-around stamina. Not so much weight loss or anything. Just stamina, really. We were looking for gyms for us all to join together, and that’s a thing, I suppose, but it makes me really worried. Like, I’m really worried about the idea. Classes would be nice, things would be nice… but I feel like it’s all just going to end up going to waste.

Don’t you need to be passionate about these things to make them work? Don’t you need to have a goal? Like I said, I’d like to not be so easily winded, but that isn’t really an exciting goal. Again, I don’t really care about losing weight, perse, though I’m sure that would be helpful for me to do. I sure as fuck don’t want more muscle. I don’t care about sports or other things where building up physical prowess is going to be something that gives me a big advantage to enjoy. It’s just this thing I’m supposed to be doing. I’m goal-less. And I know me well enough that doing something without a clear goal in mind is just not going to work out for me. Even things I’ve done to be a bit more healthy, such as trying to cut down significantly on things like soda and whatnot, were motivated by improving my budget more than anything, to be honest.

I just don’t know what my goal is here. I don’t know what will end up motivating me to go do that as opposed to work on a project I do care about, or grab some leisure time I may desperately need once the new semester starts, you know? I just don’t have this plan set in my head so that I know it will work, and that makes me worry about putting down money, much less signing a contract.

Goodness, I don’t know. Maybe I’m being dumb about it all. But that’s sort of where I am right now.

We finally got to play Maid. Like, finally. Well, okay, I finally got to play Maid, and I dragged CJ, Brian, Jonathan, and Kenny with me.

Damn, we had a good time.

I basically created a scenario, like one does when they GM. A crazy inventor lady has a house with maids. Because her company is running out of money, they desperately need an influx of investor capital, so she’s asked to show off the new invention she’s made… which she hasn’t started on yet by the time the game starts. So the maids had to prepare for the inventors coming, but also keep her on track and working.

Brian didn’t want to play, and then I strong-armed him a little, and the played, and had a great time. His maid was a zombie lady who was in a metallic “maid uniform.” Brian called her Dreadnaught-chan. Because, you know. Warhammer. CJ’s maid was a religious fanatic who got his way by being more annoying than people could stand and waiting patiently until they gave in as he tried to change the subject to the word of God. Kenny’s maid was a neat freak who was about the worst at making small talk. Jonathan’s maid was the Princess of Cheese apparently? Also, she could teleport.

Anyway, they didn’t really backstab or anything, but they sure did love to make some crazy schemes! They did all kinds of dumb things to try to cover for their Mistress’… flaws, shall we say? They ordered tons of stuff on the company credit card, fabricated “impressive” crates, and did their best to keep their Mistress from getting back on the MMO she’s been playing recently and keep working.

I think it went quite well, overall. They were mostly basically successful, everyone seemed to have a good time, and nobody really thought it was too creepy! Only mostly creepy. Then again, nobody really tried to seduce anyone, and that’s where it gets creepy. But oh well. Who needs creepy, amirite? Probably?

I don’t know if/when I’ll get to get them to try it again, but it was a pretty great night.

When you’re living with people and are like… intertwined and whatnot, it’s just kind of amazing how busy you can be when you aren’t doing anything, you know? Like, I don’t know. I feel like my time just evaporates really quickly, and I so rarely have time to just sit, and compute, and do fucking nothing, you know?

I guess, in a way, I’m kind of missing it.

Not that I’m complaining. I’m being so damn social recently, and honestly, that is awesome. That is something that had been missing from my life for way, way too long. But there’s still just… it’s nice to be able to sit down, not worry about anything, and center yourself, you know? I guess I need to figure out how to fit that into my schedule more.

There’s always those sorts of tasks that you don’t want to do but then when you do them and get past them things just flow so well, and you wonder why you waffled on it for so long, and things of that nature. There are so many things like that in the world. I’m in one in my game development.

I’ve got this thing to set up that’s going to cause a ton of work throughout the whole, you know, game-making process. It’s a branch that I’m going to have to keep reaccounting for the whole game. But it needs to be done. It’s better if it’s done. But setting it up, getting everything in place, just feels like a huge hassle. I’ve been slowly plunking at it and getting discouraged for awhile now. Once I get it done, I can move on in the plot of my game, and there will be no issue, but here we are. With me not wanting to do the work.

I’ll do it. It’ll get done. Eventually. It’s just silly how it’s holding me up.

Today we moved my desk from one side of my office to the other, a process that caused me to fall into hysterics several times and eventually cry for awhile.

No, nothing broke. No, nothing really went all that wrong, besides me stepping on a sharp thing. Yes, all we did was move my desk and a bookshelf. Yes, I am a fucking idiot.

I mean, I know why I get hysterical when there’s big changes to places where I relax and such. I have this whole history of being super ultra dependent on having my spaces being exactly the same time and again so I can feel centered and like the world isn’t total and utter shit, you know? I came to depend on that. Really depend on that. So when that gets disrupted, even when I’m in control and I’m okay with it all and everything, I still get so worked up until things can settle down and I can settle back in. It’s really fucking annoying. I shouldn’t be so stupid.

I really shouldn’t. But here I am, I guess. At least we got the desk moved.

CJ hadn’t seen The Birdcage (I know, right?) so we watched it together a few days ago. The movie is still lovely, but I just found the experience really interesting. The last time I watched The Birdcage was many years ago, when I was still kind of in the closet, hiding, and scared. Now I’m where I am now, and I totally felt differently about the characters.

I distinctly remember not thinking that Val, the son who wants his dads to hide how gay they are to impress his fiancee’s parents, was a huge asshole originally. When I watched the movie now, I was overwhelmed by how much of a dick he was. Sure, in the end, he gets caught and does the right thing once there would be serious, overwhelming consequences not to. But he literally waits until the last possible moment to claim his dads for who they are. He does it because he’s backed into a corner, not because he’s proud of them. He really comes off like a terrible person.

I didn’t used to think that. I understood the incredible fear that coming out of the closet involves. I was hiding, and scared to actually get out and be myself because I expected to be shot down and smacked down for being who I was. Going to such lengths to “tone myself down” and “not rock the boat” made sense to me, even if they sucked.

Now, that’s no longer the case. I associated myself with Armand and Albert so much more than I used to this time around. When Armand told his son “Fuck them, I worked hard to be able to be myself, and I’m not giving that up,” I was like “FUCK YES! Damn right you did!” Because I’ve done that too. When Albert gets really, really hurt about everyone trying to sneakily keep him away from the party so they wouldn’t be embarrassed, I felt that hurt a ton more than I did before, because my mother has done that same exact thing to me. I couldn’t believe their son would hurt them so much, even in the name of love.

I guess things really have changed a lot. I don’t always realize it, but my life is so much different, and so much better. Sometimes it takes something like that, an old experience revisited, to make me see it.

All dumb-ass blog, in a light, easy to digest size! It’s miniblogs.

I played the demo of Medieval Moves: Deadmund’s Quest. You may remember this game from this worst gameplay demo in the world that was very mocked. You watch this, and man, does this game look stupid.

Then I fucked around with it in a Best Buy in St. Louis and had a lot of fun. Luckily, I was not filmed: CJ’s phone was charging in the car. However, it really had fun with it. I was kind of fucking shocked. I was flailing like an idiot at first and laughing at how stupid it was. But soon I found myself really quite engaged with the bow gameplay. Shooting people with the bow in Medieval Moves feels really cool. It just feels unlike most shooting in a video game, at least with two Move controllers. The calibration was a little off in the demo, probably partially because CJ messed with the camera a bit after I started calibrating, and the other part being I was a bit too far away from the screen, but the bow stuff was still really fun. When the enemies got close, it took like two seconds to aim a perfect sword slash at them. I was honestly shocked that it felt good.

Maybe it wouldn’t hold up for a whole game, but I played that demo for, honestly, quite a long time. I was totally engaged. It’s a pretty decent little game. Who knew?

Are you hip? Cool? Have one of them newfangled “Facesbook” accounts that all the kids can’t stop going on about?

Then you better fucking play some You Don’t Know Jack. Seriously.

You know I can’t get enough Jack. This is true enough that I will log on to the goddamn Facebook just to play this. It’s a fantastic game and it continues to be enjoyable in this Facebook version.

Here’s the benefits of the Facebook version: you get to play asynchronously with your friends. The game serves you up games based on what your friends have seen, so you always have a rolling leaderboard to go against, or are setting one for your friends. Therefore, you have some of that competition you get playing the main game, if you enjoy that. The questions are just as well-written, and just as awesome as in previous versions of Jack. You’ve got Cookie back, and he’s great. Most of the question categories from the 360 game show up here with new questions, but you also get to see the triumphant return of the Gibberish Question, and the appearance of my clearly most favorite question type ever, “Elephant, Mustard, Teddy Roosevelt, or Dracula?” where you are tasked with saying if a thing is an Elephant, a type of Mustard, Teddy Roosevelt, or Dracula. The ads are as funny and fun as ever.

It is all microtransactioned to shit, though. You can only play one game a day unless you play. This isn’t a big deal for me: I’m glad to come back once a day for Jack. But it is kind of annoying. You can also buy “score enhancers” to discreetly increase your winnings, which is stupid. Still, I can’t blame Jellyvision for trying to make a buck. If it means I get more Jack, they can do whatever the fuck they want.

Anyway, dust off some Facebook account you forgot you have and play some Jack and enjoy your goddamn day. I’ll see you later.

I’m kind of having a busy weekend, so have some links, hm?

Gods, I am so excited for this game I am going to be terrible at.

These two pieces of pony music are quite good. Very Capcom.

This has to be on purpose.

This is a perfect summary, I think. Alternatively, try this summary.

Here’s some truth.

This should probably be on every webpage. If only I understood how to put it on mine…

Finally, some awesome animated gifs. Or gifts, as I originally typed it.

Cool, see you later then, okay?