The Blogtastic Blogfest That Is Getmeoutofthis.net!

I came home from the press yesterday and I passed out for several hours.

I guess you could call it a nap, but it certainly didn’t feel that way. It was a stumble upstairs haphazardly, hide in bed, and then where did 3 hours go kind of affair. I had debating skipping and just not showing up to work to sleep, but I was good, and went. Yeah. Good.

Anyway, basically, I’m tired. I’m running constantly all day doing things, so I stay up late to have free time. Then I wake up early so I can get things done so I can stay up late. I slowly whittle away more and more.

More and more and more.

And I’m pretty tired.

It’s spring break now, but I have plenty of shit to do during it anyway. I’ll still be waking up, working, and not having enough time to really unwind.

I’m awesome like that.

I think I’ll go to bed now.

I was playing a game of LoL with Essner. We were actually doing pretty good! I was playing as Sivir and wasn’t having any huge fuck-ups.

Then I guy named Curv told me I fucked up and should get off the game.
Maybe this would be understandable if I had done something, but I hadn’t done anything wrong at that moment. I was double-teamed, and I ran away, because there was nobody close. It was really annoying.

So I enacted a plan.

“Thank you for your valuable advice!” I said.

“Good. Now Uninstal,” he said.

“Oh, but I could never do that. Now that you’ve graced me with your advice, we should be able to win with no problem! If only more people would help useless players like myself with such advice, nobody would ever lose!” I said.
And then, in a stroke of genius, I kept going.
Every moment I didn’t have to click, I was writing more and more singing Curv’s praises. Telling him how much of a genius he was at the game, and how everything that came out of his mouth was the most useful thing I had ever heard. He would tell me to shut up. I would respond, “But then, how could I sing your praises? Everyone needs to know how much you’re helping me.” Then I’d keep right on going.

Eventually, he told me he had fucked my mother last night. I went on to thank him for doing such a wonderful job pleasuring her, and for being such a kind and gentle lover. I went on and on about how wonderful it was watching him make love to my mother, and that through that act, I knew his true feelings for me.

All this was going on while I was fighting beside him, healing him, and supporting him, of course.

As the game ended, I, of course, talked about how I could never have contributed to our win without him, and that I and my mother were looking forward to seeing her in the bedroom very soon.

Then I sent him a friend request.
It was immediately denied.

Never have I had so much fun in a game. I can’t wait to try it again. I really can’t. Bring it on, assholes. I’m ready to idolize you.

I’ve been playing a bit of Mega Man 10. Is that surprising? Not really, especially considering how many points I still have from that Pepsi promotion. I’ve beaten a few robot masters, and a full write-up will probably come at some point. One thing is for certain, though.

I suck at video games.

I owned Mega Man 2 and 3 as a child. I couldn’t beat them consistently, perse, but I could get really damn close most of the time.
When Mega Man 9 came out, I played it and tried it. It was really hard to me. I eventually beat a majority of robot masters, but never got close to beating it. It was too hard for me.
When they announced that Mega Man 10 would have an easy mode, I was excited. Finally, I could just enjoy the retro goodness!

I still die all the time.

There are two modes of “easy.” One is the actual Easy mode, which adds platforms over many bottomless pits and spikes so you have less random deaths. The other is picking Protoman over Mega Man, who can use the slide, charged mega buster, and has a shield to block projectiles. I’m doing both of them, and I’m still dying to pits, platforming segments, and bosses.

It’s honestly just kind of sad.

I know that, in general, all that matters is if I am having fun. And I’m having a good time, sure. No worries. But goodness, especially compared to the people on Talking Time, which are probably destroying the game with their eyes closed on one life at this point, I feel kind of inadequate. That hasn’t stopped me from switching most games I play to easy nowadays, and it won’t in the future. It’s just… especially obvious on games like these, which are so much like hard games I used to not have a lot of problems with.

Yeah, I suck. I admit it. There you go.

Note that this is my post talking about the end of Forumwarz episode 3, which basically finished up the entire arc of all three episodes. So if you’re still playing, or think you might want to play? Well, don’t read this one! It’ll tell all.

Ready to read? Okay, good.

Forumwarz is so fucking awesome.
I mean, seriously, the game is just so well put together, and the plot completely paid off for me.

Okay, not completely.

Here’s where the spoilarz come in, Shallow was a sentient AI created by Sentrillion. This is not completely unexpected (though honestly, from the end of episode 2 I was more leaning towards the player character being the AI) but it does pay off. The majority of the characters you talk to in the game are apparently Shallow as well, which makes a good deal of sense, seeing how things were proceeding and people always had a mission for you and were always willing to pay you tons of Flezz.

The moment you find this out, you have to go kill Shallow.

Now, the logic behind this decision isn’t too bad? Shallow wants you to kill him because he’s going to die anyway, and he (or she, I suppose) obviously likes you, and you were nice enough to make sure his child went out into the world. You can then kill him in a number of ways. I picked the good way, “fake” killing him by temporarily bringing down the Sentrillion servers. The ending then describes me having a great pal in the first artificial life form, who eventually asks if I would like to merge with his consciousness, which the game describes, appropriately, as erotic.

That all sounded fine. A fitting ending.

But it was also a little unsatisfying.

I wanted to actually see how my relationship with Shallow changed knowing that he was playing so many people to understand various pieces of humanity through how I talked to him. How do I, the character, interact with him from then on? It would be very, very different. Trying to grok that he is all this people, many of whom you have to cyber sex with during the game, is really going to change that working relationship.
What’s more, what in the world is my character going to do now? The ending says I am “successful” but my job, up until that point, was basically being paid by Shallow to be a guinea pig for his experiments. Is that still my job? Or do I go work full-time for Carolyn Fartz at Geronimo? Or what?

I think some people would think I’m foolish for having become so attached to my player character and the characters in the game, but the fact that they were so real while being so ridiculous was one of the reasons I love Forumwarz. Sure, the plot is steeped in internet humor, but the characters themselves tended to be written in an intelligent way, especially your player character. I liked that. I wanted to see where it goes. And I wanted to see how the core relationship of the game evolves after this big revelation.

At the same time, that’s the sensible place to end the game, of course, so I don’t blame them.

There are a few unanswered questions. Will there be more Forumwarz content? (I hope so!) Will the new story use your current character? (I don’t know! I’d be happy either way.) Do you find out who the main villain of episode 3 actually was? Or was he just some guy? (I feel a suggestion that he was Shallow, but I kind of doubt that. Maybe in some of the other endings, he is.) There are ways they can go. If nothing else, I’m going to be right there with some cash no matter what their next thing is.

But goodness, I enjoyed this game. Thanks, Crotch Zombie guys. You did pretty awesome.

My TA friends were nice, and invited me to go work on homework with them this evening.

I turned them down.

The idea of leaving the house filled me with dread. I was supposed to relax this evening, but already I was drawn to a family dinner and seeing my brother’s new house. I already had to commute up to St. Louis. I already had to do a lot of things. None of these things are things that I hate. I wanted to do all of them.

But what I really, really wanted to do was relax.

I wanted to sit down and beat my game. I wanted to snuggle and unwind. I wanted to not be running constantly, and not have to worry about doing anything in particular.

I turned them down, and went back to my game, but I can’t concentrate on it. I feel like I have failed by not going to get my work done. I can’t relax and play any more. I can’t ever relax. I have so, so much to do. I have so many nice people in my life, but they want things from me, and I’m already stretched thin. I have so much I need to handle and take care of.
So much.

Fuck this.

I should not feel like this.

Fuck this.

…guess I best get to bed so I can do it all again tomorrow.

Hello there! I am typing on my brand new Lap-Top Com Pew Tor. It’s got a number pad, which I am less excited about, and all kinds of bloatware, which I am also less excited about. But it’s running along pretty well. The screen looks fantastic, though it is reflective, and this keyboard is feeling good. It has a button that turns off the touch pad, too, so that it doesn’t fuck me up while I’m typing, which is excellent if I really get into my typing, or hook up a mouse. Most important, though, Windows 7 is pretty awesome. At least thus far.

I already love some of the little things about Windows 7. The start menu is kind of the best of both worlds, being a combination of the Launcher on Mac OSX, which is kind of cool, but not for me, and the normal task bar. This works like the normal bar, but you can stick common programs to it, Launcher-style, and I am liking that so far. You can also mouse over to see the little image of the windows and pick the one you want, which is pretty cool.

I’m also really in love with the stupid little details. I love the automagically changing wallpaper. That is just such a neat little thing, and it makes me happy. It’s certainly, at the very least, going to make me search for good computer wallpaper more often. That, combined with the fact that I believe, if this was on my desktop, that I could set individual wallpapers for both my monitors on my main box, is something I can really get behind. Apparently it doesn’t take much to please me.

Anyway, I’m still in that new gadget glow. I’m enjoying it. We’ll see how I feel as I work with it over the next week or two. But yeah, I’m pretty happy with my purchase at the moment. It’s neat. Yay for lappies!

Due to pressure from the fellow TA camp, and wanting to be more connected with them (they are awesome people) I started to attempt to use my dormant Facebook account, which I mostly made just for games with Facebook connect.

It’s just mostly lead to me feeling awkward and old.

I stare at the Facebook interface, and I just don’t get what it’s supposed to be used for. It has a twitter-style news feed, certainly, so I guess I know what to put there, maybe? But there are so many other things and elements that seem to do the same thing. It’s constantly suggesting I add more friends. You have these kind of nestled comments, so you have to pay attention to posts you were probably done with days ago, perhaps. I just don’t get it. It’s not an “up to the minute” thing like Twitter, and it’s not a slightly more calculated affair like my bloeg here, or whatever. I just don’t really get what I’m supposed to use it for.
On top of all that is the IM service they have built in, but that they don’t let you access unless you are sitting on the page. I thought that hooking Facebook to Flock, here, would let me be online and chat much like I do normally with AIM and whatnot, but no. Facebook doesn’t let you in. They had instructions for getting Pidgin to hook into it, but they were wrong. You have to literally be just sitting on the Facebook page to chat, which just strikes me as completely ruining any utility it may have as a chat platform. Yet people apparently use it exclusively. I talk to people on Campus about AIM, and they stare at me like I’m crazy and talking about something from another planet.

I just don’t get the service, but on top of that comes a social awkwardness I haven’t felt online in a long time. There are no screen names. There are only real names. Maybe I am antisocial or something, I don’t know, but seeing someone’s actual name on posts and friend requests is really awkward with me. I can’t ignore or decline people with a real name. I don’t know who they are, but they have a real name. Maybe they are someone I should know, but have completely forgotten the name of. That is completely likely. Maybe it’s someone I talk to every single day. Maybe.
At the same time, could it be? Because like most online accounts, I set this up with Alexis, not what most of the people around campus know me as and call me. This makes it extra weird when people want to friend me. Do they know who I actually am? Why that’s my name? Or do they expect me to be someone completely different, and they’ll be disappointed when they learn who I actually am?

Man, I don’t know. I don’t like you, Facebook. I’m going to keep trying, but… such worry you are instilling in me. Stupid socializing with the non-internet world. Stop being so complicated.

I’ve recently had inspiration regarding the next poetry project in my head. Basically, I’ve figured out the plot.

It’s going to be tough to write.

The main character is still percolating in my head, but basically, she is going to be dealing with someone close to her transitioning. And then, because I’m fucking lame like that, I throw a few more wrenches into the works, namely “brother” and “lover.” I’ve got their relationship slowly building in my head. Key moments, and some of the key concerns that this character is going to go through. A lot more percolation, and I’ll be ready to start writing.

But goodness, the moment I realized that was what I was going to write this next book about, my stomach dropped out from under me, and I felt ill. I know you can’t see the whole thing from that bit of rambling up there, but give me a little credit: I know this is going to be something worth reading and looking at. I knew it the moment the concept hit my head. This is going to work, this is something I can write, this is something I am interested in, and this is something I have first-hand experience with. It’s doable, and it’s going to be good.
But I’m determined not to write about me, perse. I mean, I could write about my experiences. In fact, I’m sure I will write about them someday. But there’s not anywhere vaguely near enough distance yet to really do that. At the same time, I need to channel this stuff. I need to put my knowledge and understanding of such things to use. It works fairly well when I put pieces of it into short stories. I should use that here, too. I need to use parts of me. It’ll work.
Therefore, I’ve come up with this other character, and this other approach. But even just building this person (I keep calling her Jennifer in my head, so maybe that’ll be her name) makes me attempt to put myself in the other side of what’s happening, and that’s hard. It’s depressing. Though, I will admit, putting my head into the state of any character in the middle of as much turmoil as I envision for this one is going to get me like that. It’s just… really close to home.

I really know how to pick projects.

But, yes, I have a plan. I wouldn’t be surprised if I started to write poems soon for this book.

Apparently I am someone who writes books of poetry now.
Yep.

I mean, seriously.

I am just kind of going crazy with this Research class.
Yes, I’ll get everything done. Yes, I’ll survive and pass it just fine. I’m not going to let it hold me back or anything.

But DAMN. So frustrating.

The core of the frustration stems from the way the majority of the assignments are framed. I have these “research problems” with very, extremely open-ended questions that have extremely specific answers to them. I hate that. I need to find a “reputable source” for this or that, but what does that mean? I could find a reliable source for that information, but goodness, I used Google, so it doesn’t count. It just makes me want to punch something. It is a den of frustration.

Can you tell I’ve been working on this stuff all morning?
I’m frustrated.
Arg. Ugh.

It’s just frustrating because it’s been a long time since I had a class that made me mad. I’d kind of fallen in love with this class stuff. I’d really taken to it. Really clicked with academia, you know? But then this class.
Grrrr.

Okay, I’m done being angry now.
Okay, not completely, but I’m done being angry in my bloeg.

Kingdom of Loathing loves its Librams, but hey, at least it created a fairly new sort of Libram in the Libram of BRICKOs. This lets you summon BRICKO bricks, which you can then use to build various things. Some are equipment, like the BRICKO Pants or BRICKO sword, but most are actually monsters that you build, and then fight without taking a turn. Many of them take many, many BRICKOs to build, and have unique drops.

This really seems like an item for collectors. Granted, having a potential 10 free combats a day for getting stats IS useful, and you can do that with the BRICKO monsters, but you’ll never be able to summon enough bricks to keep yourself in high level monsters for most of a run. No, it seems like the overall goal of the Libram is to be something you spend excess mana on when you already have enough of the other Libram items. You build up a huge, huge collection, and use it to fight the high level monsters with the unique drops, doing things like building the gilded BRICKO chalice, which is basically another facsimile dictionary, only without having to ascend again, which seems like some people would find a use for. Of course, the main draw for most people would be the familiar, the BRICKO chick, which requires a combat with a Gargantuchicken and 6900 bricks to build. That’s a really long term goal. But it’s nice to have long-term goals.

That’s really what this libram is. It’s a bunch of long-term goals that you can slowly work towards with very minimal to no turn consumption. I like this, and I assume that many other players like it too, since it doesn’t mess with their runs like, say, working on the long-term stuff in the empty bottles and whatnot. Also, it seems like, since you need so, so many bricks, that BRICKO bricks will be a decent source of meat, if you just want to pawn them all off. For a few mana a day, you get 3 of an item that sells for 800 or more meat. Seems like a decent tradeoff to me, if you don’t want to jump on the building bandwagon.

Yeah, I like this one. It’s different. Unique. And, like the best IoTMs, it gives you something else to do, to extend the life of the game. That’s the main reason I pick these things up. I want to switch up the experience so that I have more fun. That seems like what this is doing. I’m down with that.