August 17, 2009
I don’t know why all the cutscenes weren’t in engine, either.
Mirror’s Edge was a game that was kind of exciting to look at from a distance. Here was a game that not only looked unique, but was bringing mechanics you just don’t see anywhere to the table: first person parkour. Oh man, new and experimental, exactly what gaming needs, right? I mean, it’s going to be a bit rough around the edges, but it’ll still be fun, right?
Mirror’s Edge is not a game that likes you.
Maybe it’s because I’ve played Prince of Persia so recently, but this game just doesn’t want you to play it. Sure, Prince had some missteps. Combat wasn’t interesting, for example. But it also wasn’t frustrating, and the actual action of running, swinging, and jumping was completely enjoyable, if a little on rails.
Mirror’s Edge doesn’t let you get any fun out of running fast and making cool jumps until you’ve practiced and run through the level a time or two. Getting into a new area in Mirror’s Edge is mostly fraught with confusion about deciding where to go. This is supposed to be fixed with Runner’s Vision and the B button, which gives you a hint, but the hint just makes Faith look in a random direction and is completely useless, and Runner’s Vision only seems to highlight things when I don’t need it to. So many times I had no fucking idea where to go, and the game did absolutely nothing to help me. Even with a FAQ open, it was hard to figure out. I hate that.
But not running blazing fast all the time, that could be forgiven if the game would actual focus on that. That’s its appeal, and that’s why you want to play it. But the game has all kinds of arbitrary fight scenes where you have to use intense precision timing to disarm foes and then gun them down with horribly-implemented shooter mechanics. Hopefully you do them perfectly, because even on easy, I died constantly. Easy was supposed to make the combat easier, and yet I would fail time and again. I can’t imagine how pointlessly hard it is on other difficulties. To make matters worse, the checkpoint system is so bad that, even if you manage to survive one of these gun-firing combats, if you fail the jump right after it, which you might do, depending on how complicated it is, then guess what? It’s time to re-do the fight.
It was in just this situation, in the 7th level, that I said “Fuck this noise” and sent it back to Gamefly. I don’t need games that frustrate me. My leisure time need not be filled with things that make me angry. So fuck you, Mirror’s Edge. You had so much potential. Come back when you want to entertain me, eh?
When I first played through Mirror’s Edge I had a blast in every section but for the combat. (The lack of direction was solved by running through it together with a buddy over Skype; where one of us got lost, the other one found a way.) Since then, I’ve developed an excellent strategy for taking down dudes (regardless of difficulty setting):
1) slide; fist to the junk,
2) fist to the face,
3) repeat steps 1 and 2 as necessary until catharsis has been achieved. Sure, it’s fighting dirty, but your opponent has A GUN.
The game has treated me pretty well ever since and I still pop it in from time to time, though I pray they improve the fight mechanics for the sequel and give Easy or Normal modes the leeway you’d find in a Prince of Persia or a Sly Cooper game.
Comment by Lobst — August 17, 2009 @ 8:55 am