The Blogtastic Blogfest That Is Getmeoutofthis.net!

Well, the trip is over, and this’ll be the last of the little visit blogs, I suppose. Back to my normal blogging stupidity tomorrow.

Our last day together was nice, but much too short, of course. I taught, and he made French Toast, which I had shown him how to make. It turned out well! Then we left for St. Louis. We had some sushi! I had had sushi before, but only like… shitty sushi, and not like… a meal of it. Just like a single sushi people had handed me to try. It was really good! I really enjoyed it, even though I made a fool of myself with chopsticks. The lady at the restaurant swooped in with a fork for me, and kept giving me sushi lessons because she could tell I was completely clueless. It was very appreciated.

Then we drove past the arch, so he could see it, and then we went to the airport. We parked and I cried a lot again. I wasn’t going to, dammit. But I did. He was all “It’s going to be okay” and had, several days ago, bought tissues intelligently, and had some to give me. I got my crying done, and then we played one more game of Carcasssonne. Then I dropped him off. We hugged and kissed, and hugged some more. And that was it. I drove away.

His texts since were very sad. I’m all scared that he got emotional after I left, because he felt he couldn’t with all my stupid crying. But he’s home safe, so that’s good.

If there’s one thing this trip taught me, it’s this: I did so much worrying about making this a relationship. I was so scared about getting hurt again, about hurting Brer, about so many things. I wanted it, but I didn’t think life would let me have it. Well, it has. It has, and it’s wonderful. It was the right decision. It was all the right decision. Maybe at some point in the future things fall apart. I don’t think it will, at least not in a huge disaster way, but that happens to things sometimes. If it does, so be it. But the time I’m having now will make it all worth it. This is something worth trying for. With Brer and Aesa… people who love me by my side… how can things be bad? How can life be shitty with so much love?

It can’t be. It can’t be.