The Blogtastic Blogfest That Is Getmeoutofthis.net!

Before the end of the semester, I have to submit a bunch more stories to magazines and stuff as part of my independent study thing. Now, one might think that I would be pumped or at least not really stressed by the idea of doing this, seeing as I just got a short story accepted somewhere and thus am obviously an author worth publishing, in theory. Really, the exact opposite is true. I am dreading it.

I feel like I’m in the unfortunate place of knowing too much, but not having the experience of knowing how to use it. I’ve been on the receiving end of creative submissions at the press. I’ve seen the mistakes and I’ve seen how I react to what people send in that is just not good or really stupidly formatted. I know how important it is to follow guidelines and do things the right way if I want to be taken seriously as a professional. Let’s face it, if there’s one thing I want to feel like when I send this stuff out there, it’s like a professional writer. That’s all one gets out of it. I don’t want to seem like an amateurish dolt, or someone so full of themselves that they are too annoying to publish. I want to do this shit right, if I’m going to do it.

What should be a fairly simple affair of slapping together a cover letter, changing the formatting on a word document, and sending stuff out becomes a really stressful event for me. I pour over the guidelines and quadruple check everything, and even then worry that I’m misunderstanding them. Is this piece right for here? Am I understanding what they want? I recheck the spelling on my cover letter over and over, wanting to make sure it doesn’t sound stupid. I get obsessed that there must be something I’m missing, something that’s going to reflect really poorly on me, and make me come across as someone who is wasting these fine people’s time. I don’t want to be a waste of time. Even if my stories aren’t the right stories for them, I want the whole transaction to be smooth, and fun. But to do that, everything needs to be right. I worry and worry and when I finally send it out it’s like I’m gasping for breath, recovering from terror.

Then I have to search for another magazine to submit to and start the process all over.

Yeah, not looking forward to getting that done. It’ll be good that I did, but goodness. I hope I can keep my worry under control. When it gets out, it really goes ballistic.