The Blogtastic Blogfest That Is Getmeoutofthis.net!

Cole kept pointing out Trailers for Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga’Hoole. This is how I knew I would one day be called upon to view it. This day came.

It was pretty well what I expected.

Basically, what you have here is a children’s movie using very strong “children’s entertainment” themes, like the Power of Friendship. On top of that, it’s an adaptation of a series of novels. It’s a one-two punch of potential badness vectors. It basically succumbs to both. There are lines and moments in the film that are so, so “children’s movie cliche” that I just laughed, and Cole turned to me to ask what was so funny. I just couldn’t believe they’d be so blatant! Meanwhile, the movie introduces a ton of characters and doesn’t give any of them enough time to be anybody, a clear sign of a book adaptation. Eventually there’s this whole band of Owls with Mr. Main Character, and they’re entertaining, but you never really get the sense they get to know each other enough to be this unbreakable party the movie makes them to be.

I also just have to point out the visuals. They are so creepy! The owls are rendered realistic enough to look kind of uncanny valley. Especially when they talk, and it’s clear how hard it is to animate speech when beaks are involved. It’s just so… odd. I don’t understand why they didn’t try to stylize the art a bit. I mean, they’re owls wielding fucking swords and stuff, you’d think they’d go for a little art direction to make it more bad ass. I mean, not cartoony, perse, but just something.

I do have to comment on the moments of “sexual tension” in the film. Mr. Main Character meets up, early on, with a small-species owl girl. There’s a lot of “I’ll protect you, we’ll do this together, stay with me” sort of dialog which tends to indicate “love interest” in these sorts of movies. Then, later, both her and wacky comic relief owl are doing what I can only describe as snuggling with Mr. Main Character. Nobody thinks this is weird. Finally, they get to Ga’Hoole, and Mr. Main Character meets another girl owl of his species who says her name but never does anything else. He is smitten, and the little owl seems annoyed.
And that’s it. That’s your romance subplot.
I dunno, found myself wondering what was up with that.

Still, I can’t say the movie was completely awful. It was competent. I could see me getting much more behind it at a much younger age. There were also several character who were genuinely funny The running gag with the two slavers had me chuckling, for example. I also didn’t leave feeling like I had wasted my time. I mean, I can’t really recommend going and seeing it unless you have kids or something, but I felt like I got what I came for. It was competent. That’s pretty well the exact word for it. Competent. Also, containing owls. And music by Owl City. Which, when I heard it, made me groan. Cause they went there. Yes, they went there.