The Blogtastic Blogfest That Is Getmeoutofthis.net!

I almost wrote “Merry Oviposition Appreciation Day” on the workload planner at work, but realized that was a terrible idea for many different reasons, such as me having to explain what the hell that meant, and so I didn’t. True story.

I am really lame sometimes.

In any case, it’s Easter, a day of bunny rabbits, for some reason, as well as a guy named Jesus. I heard he was a cool dude.

I must admit, though, that Easter has lost most meaning for me. It’s a great reason to rock out to Jesus Christ Superstar, and really, a reason to do that is fantastic, and it’s a great reason to buy a bunch of cheap candy the next week and get one day off of school. As I think I’ve said before, it’s always nice to have a reason to eat a nice meal with the family. But it just… doesn’t have significance.

I wonder if it feels big to people who have more faith in this stuff. It’s supposedly the huge event of the religious year, but it still almost seems like that day is really Christmas, because there’s so much more, socially, around that.

I suppose there’s no reason to really wonder about it. To me, it’ll just be a fairly kickass Sunday, where I will spend time with my family and do some serious viewing of the new Doctor Who premier and, frankly, that’s enough for me. Still, I hope however your Easter goes, that it’s super neat.

An episode of You Don’t Know Jack is a precious thing. It’s funny. It’s entertaining. It’s interesting. The last thing I want to do is waste it by only experiencing it alone. Thus, I never play games of Jack on the 360 or otherwise without friends about. This, of course, limits my consumption considerably.

Because of this, in a way, I’m kind of glad that You Don’t Know Jack for iOS is a single-player affair. Finally, I can feel good about enjoying all the Jack I want without feeling like I’m ruining some theoretical future fun time with my friends on the couch. Sure, it would be better if it had some sort of multiplayer. For example, on the iPad only version, I don’t understand why two people couldn’t hold the sides of the iPad and buzz in by tapping on one side of the screen. And, sure, 20 episodes isn’t a huge amount of content, especially considering the ridiculous amount of game you can get on iOS for a buck nowadays. Still, it’s a blast, like Jack always is.

While iOS Jack uses all the same animations and question types (such as Who’s the Dummy? and Funky Trash) as the latest console and PC version of the game, the questions are all new. Cookie has recorded new jokes, dialog, and quips for every single episode, and thus every single one is a hilarious time. The demo calls the game “engorged with humor” and if you’ve ever played a Jack game before, you know that to be true. (Well, or you don’t like the game’s sense of humor, I guess, and already know you wouldn’t like this version.) The game plays just fine, of course. You’re simply tapping on answers instead of selecting them with a controller, and areas of the screen are denoted for situations like Dis or Dats. It’s not the sort of game you’re going to play without sitting down to commit to it, of course, because it just doesn’t work without being able to hear Cookie, but for a car ride, or just fucking around on your iDevice like I do, the game is fantastic.

I bought the HD version, which probably was a mistake. The leaderboards aren’t shared with the non-HD version, so I can’t compare scores with everyone else on Talking Time who’s playing, and let’s face it: Jack is just showing text, so it’s not really a better experience being slightly higher in definition. It also cost $2 more, but I don’t mind that, as Jellyvision deserves all my money forever, and I’m glad to pay them a bit extra. Still, if you’re going to get the game, grab the iPhone version. Not worth the premium if you aren’t out to support a favorite developer like I was.

I know Jellyvision is going to do this version of the game right. They’ll probably have paid and free episode updates, and I’m all for that. Hell, they already had a little “stealth” DLC update by having the demo have completely different questions than the full version. (So play the demo, if nothing else, dammit!) But basically, if you like trivia at all, buy this app. Then buy a second copy of the console reboot of the franchise. Then buy a copy on Steam. Do everything you can to get more Jack into the world. Because more Jack is a wonderful thing.

I guess this game came out. It’s called Portal 2 or something? People seem to think it’s a big deal.
That’s because it is, really. It’s fantastic.

I’ve beat the single player. I haven’t had a chance to dig into the multiplayer yet, but soon, I’m sure. Still, there’s no doubt about it: if you care about laughing, enjoying yourself, or video games as a medium, you need to play Portal 2 at some point. Maybe not now. Maybe when it drops in price. But you need to play the game on some platform at some point. Trust me on this.

I’m not going to discuss story or spoilers because, I dunno, I don’t need to. There are those things, but it’s mostly a vehicle for the humor in the game, which is top-notch. The game is constantly throwing funny dialog at you, and fresh dialog too. The horrible, run-into-the-ground memes from Portal are touched on in a way that indicates that they’re old school, stupid, and overused at this point. It’s cute, suitable, and way more effective than constant ref backs to those painfully overdone jokes would have been. This game is its own game, its own thing, and Valve still knows how to do humor in the best way, when they give it a try.

What really shines, to me, is the way that Valve is a master at setting up these puzzles. Everything feels extremely polished and well-designed, and you rarely feel at a loss for what to do and what you can do, even as things get extremely complicated. The game, much like it’s predecessor, is really, really great at teaching you the rules of the world organically so that it feels like you’re coming up with the tips and tricks yourself. They do this while still keeping everything feeling fresh. I never really felt like I was rehashing old territory ever in the game. Even the earlier “tutorials” that were teaching you about the basics of the game for people who didn’t play Portal were remixed from the original in interesting ways. It’s just almost a lesson in good game design. I can’t wait to listen to the commentary and see what they said about it. That probably will, straight up, be such a lesson.

I will admit, I got stuck twice, and sought help. Both times I was over-thinking the situation and missing a really easy maneuver that would solve my problems. I’m sure if I had taken a break, I could have solved it without help, though I appreciated being able to keep moving forward: the game is a fantastic ride.

Basically, Portal wasn’t a one-trick pony. This really is a full game worth your money. I’d be glad to have played just the single player, even without the lengthy co-op, honesty. But I’m also the sort who doesn’t worry much about length. (Plus I know the game is effectively twice as long, because I really want to hear the commentary and will run through it again for that.) Again, do what you think is right. Wait for a sale. Rent it for a weekend. Just put Portal 2 on your “to play” list, okay? Okay.

You know what I need to do? I need to enjoy my successes.

I got an acceptance email from a lit mag today, saying that my short story, “Downsizing,” has been accepted for publication there.

That’s top of cool, isn’t it?

At the same time, I didn’t really jump up and down. I told everyone because that’s what I’m supposed to do, you know? In the same way, I succeeded at this because that’s what’s supposed to happen. I’m supposed to write things, and submit them, and get them published.

Basically, this is, like, the stupidest way to think about things ever, and I do it all the time.

I don’t know why my instant reaction to being successful is to undercut my success and attempt to make it meaningless. When amazing, awesome victory is merely “adequate,” it’s hard to take joy in anything. But this is really cool. This is like, the first time a serious publication has picked up my work. This is a thing that I should be proud of, and I’m letting my stupid brain stop me from being proud.

So fuck that, I am proud. I did it. Me. I win at writing, and will continue to win.
I’m cool.

At this point, I’ve played an afternoon or so of Assassin’s Creed: Brotherhood multiplayer, and I just have to say, it was everything I hoped for.

A long time ago, I bought The Ship, because it sounded really cool. The idea of having one target you had to sneak around and kill sounded like a lot of fun, but in reality, it just didn’t work. Since the only people on the map were players, it was much safer just to kill everyone, even if they weren’t your target, in case they were gunning for you. There was no actual way to hide or be stealthy, because there was no way to mistake you for someone who wasn’t out to get you. It was a good idea, but a flawed execution.

Similar, Assassin’s Creed 2 did a lot of things right. You felt like a real badass when you stabbed someone, and you could really move about the world well, climbing over buildings and so on. However, needing to be stealthy always annoyed me. I’m just trying to get somewhere fast, why am I getting in trouble for running instead of moving at a snail’s pace? The game seemed to punish you for using the movement freedom it gave you by making you run about and avoid guards all the time. It annoyed me. What was the point of hiding from the stupid AI? Why is running a crime in Italy?

Brotherhood multiplayer is the best of both of these worlds. The way you have to stalk your targets works just how it should have in The Ship. The game world is populated with AI versions of all the players, who go about their daily lives. Thus, you really do have to check out each character, and see if they are acting “AI-like,” all while not blowing your cover as well. This gives you a reason to do all the cool things you can do in Assassin’s Creed. Blending in with crowds makes you go into AI routines, so you look like everyone else. Walking with a crowd makes you automatically follow the crowd in an AI-like way. You can scale buildings to give chase to your targets, or run away, but that is non-AI behavior, and is going to be noticed by other players who will react accordingly. Thus, it becomes less stupid that running tips people off to your presence.

Anyway, I love it. It’s a lot of fun. With Portal 2 waiting, I can see me never playing the single player of Brotherhood, and just playing more rounds of this from time to time when I need a break.

The main complaint I’ve heard about the multiplayer is how you can’t really do anything about who is hunting you. Personally, I think that works as it should. It dodges the “just kill everyone” thing that happens in The Ship. Attacking anyone, AI or player, who isn’t your target will turn out very badly for you. It keeps you focused on what the multiplayer is all about, which is stalking people. Yes, sometimes I found myself frustrated that my counter didn’t go off before I died, but for the most part, if I get killed, I just go “Ah, damn, should have paid more attention,” respawn, and keep going. Plus, I’ve unlocked the Smoke Bombs, and those totally let you fuck over pursuers that you see coming, but can’t stun. There are options.

Basically, the game forces you to play the game, which I don’t mind at all. Even if you’re bad at Brotherhood’s multiplayer, you’re still getting a worthwhile experience. Smart things, like having multiple people targeting players high on the leaderboard, and nearly nobody trying to kill lower ranking players, really helps make the game feel friendly if you aren’t doing well, and really intense, even if you’re playing a bunch of newbies who don’t know what they’re doing.

Anyway, it’s not perfect, but I am really, really impressed and wanting to play more. Even little touches, like the fact that your character moves about the city like an AI player until you tilt the stick when you respawn is just such a nice touch. I’m sure the experience will be even better in the inevitable Assassin’s Creed sequel, and I look forward to that too. But it’s just so refreshing to have a multiplayer versus mode that doesn’t feel like the same deathmatch bullshit over and over again. I love it.

I wonder where the luck/strategy threshold is for Essner.

So we played Acquire this evening, a game which has a strong random element to it. You draw tiles from a box that you can play on the board. Knowing what kind of connections you can make with tiles and guessing what various hotels your opponents are investing in are important to the game. When you know this, you’ll know what is going to buy out what, and thus what to invest in. Of course, you only know the moves possible from your hand. You don’t know what everyone else is drawing.

Essner seems to think this creates a game where there is no strategy to the moves and decisions you make, and someone just randomly wins. While luck does play a huge part, the idea that it’s only luck is verifiable as not true, which I think he would admit. It doesn’t change his gut reaction to the game, though, which is perfectly fair. A lot of the game can feel really random.

I just wonder where the line is for that kind of reaction, though. I mean, this is a guy who loves to play those coin push machines, and I feel like that’s almost completely random. Does he agree? Does he think there’s some small element of strategy in playing those games? I can’t speak for him, so I’m not sure. We play stuff like Magic, which has an obvious random element in card drawing, and other games with dice rolls and things of that nature, and he doesn’t really seem to think those are luck based, even though he always critically misses.

I don’t mean to pick on Essner. The other people I know who don’t like Acquire have the exact same feeling about it. I just wonder what it is about how the game goes that causes it to feel that way. Is it simply because you have to hedge your bets against many possible futures, and try to set up a situation where you can capitalize on most of them, as opposed to dealing with one threat in front of you?

This is what I am thinking about as I head to bed. What do you think of Acquire?

I remember when I was young, and we had Comedy Central. Late at night, at the crazy late time of midnight, they would show Mystery Science Theater 3000. It was a magical show, and I remember trying, each and every time when I didn’t have to get up early the next day, to stay up and watch it. Almost always I would fail, but those times when I didn’t were the best times. True comedy times.

Now I live in an age where I would say that the majority of my non-video game entertainment, and significant amount of my entertainment overall is based in watching things that have taken this general format and ran with it. Stuff like Spoony, the many, many LPs I watch, and so on, are all comedy similar to that which I tried my hardest to get to see over and over again. Still, I guess I wonder why I gravitate to spending my time on that, when so many other avenues of amazing entertainment are out there. I’m behind on Community, 30 Rock, and Archer. I hear Important Things is on Netflix streaming now. So many things I could be watching. Yet this is what I spend my time on.

Here’s my current theory: it turns viewing into a pseudo-social experience. Now, that seems kind of potentially depressing, that I’d be replacing the people commentating in these videos for “real friends,” but it’s kind of true. I never see films alone, nor do I want to. I never watch TV shows unless I’m watching them with people, really. If I’m turning a television on, it’s because I need inoffensive background noise, I’m going to play a game on that television, or I’m watching something with someone. I don’t really watch things on my own. It’s slowly gotten to the point where it just doesn’t fit with how I go about doing things.
So I watch Let’s Plays were I have commentators “watching” with me and cracking jokes, adding to the experience. And I sit there, enjoying their humor, obviously, but also thinking about what they’re missing, reacting accordingly, and so on. It gives me the extra level of interaction I have sitting around doing something with my friends, but I can have it when my friends are busy or otherwise indisposed.

Did I manage to write that in a way that didn’t sound lame? I don’t feel like it’s lame. I feel like it makes sense. I watch things because I want to have the social interaction around watching something, whether it be discussing an episode over dinner or whatever. These sorts of internet entertainment let me have that in one complete package when I can’t figure out how to make schedules work.
And hey, if you have a better explanation, I’d love to hear it.

Today, my mother asked about buying a 360 for her TV downstairs.

I thought this was a bit silly, but I told her the price. She didn’t feel like it was worth 200 dollars. When I asked her why she wanted one, it was so she could play games. Well, hey, that seems like the reason one would get a 360. Of course, the games she wanted to play was trivia stuff like You Don’t Know Jack and whatnot. She wants to be able to play with Dad without bothering me, which is nice of her, of course. It’s not a great idea. She doesn’t trust herself with a 360 controller at all, so I don’t know what she’d do with actually owning a system. But it’s kind of cool she wanted to.
I followed this up by showing her the new Jack on my iPad and some of the funny Portal 2 videos that have been going around. I was showing her what was going on in gaming, and she seemed relevantly interested.

It’s kind of amazing to me that trivia has basically made my mother respect one of my biggest past-times. She doesn’t understand most of what I do, of course, but she gets the appeal of having everyone over to play Jack, or Buzz, or Scene It!. She wants to play these games, and even though it’s normally a huge hassle for me (she’ll only play them downstairs, so I have to unhook all my systems and carry them downstairs and hook them up there and such, which would be less of a problem except I am also forced to hide all the cables, making it hard to adjust things, but oh well) I always go ahead and do it because I love having her, and dad, and everyone involved. It feels awesome, and it’s a lot of fun. It worked with Dad and Golf, and it works with my mother and trivia.

Similarly, giving my mother a good, working laptop has done wonders for her understanding why I am on the internet all day. She gets as stressed as I do when the internet doesn’t work nowadays. She is on there, watching videos, reading news, or playing games on Yahoo games basically every night. She understands it, and doesn’t fight with me about being connected anymore.

For so long, I wished she would just leave me alone, or try to understand why I enjoy what I enjoy. It always seemed to hypocritical that she’d tell me I needed to not play games the whole night when she’d spend the whole night watching television. Finally, I have that understanding, at least with this stuff, and that’s pretty neat. Gives me hope for other things.

Flock sent me an e-mail today, telling me of it’s death.

Right around the time I fell in love with having two monitors, I heard about Flock. Originally a fork of Firefox, and eventually a fork of Chrome (and changing right around the time I changed over myself, like it loved me), Flock was supposed to be a “social web browser.” It originally drew me in with its interesting bookmark integration and built-in blogging software, and soon became my main browser, with Firefox, and eventually Chrome, sitting on my second monitor for opening links people sent me in chat and whatnot. It was built upon the solid innards of the more popular browsers, but it was something unique, and something mine. It worked well, and I enjoyed it. Even after Chrome appeared as a fantastic second browser to Firefox, I found myself ending up booting Firefox 3 to the curb instead, and sticking with Flock.

Alas, I should have guessed this day would come. As much as I loved Flock, it really didn’t offer anything that Firefox with three or four plugins didn’t have. Nobody was going to pile onto it. It couldn’t be worth the money to keep developing and updating. I’m not surprised they’re closing up shop, but I am sad to lose it.
I guess I have a little Indie Rock Pete in me, as I really did enjoy using a browser that was capable, but unknown. It was my special portal to the internet, that only I used. I don’t think I ever met anyone else that knew about it. It didn’t have the stigma of something like Opera, and it was not as complete bullshit as Safari or IE. It was totally mine. It has a special place in my heart because of that.

I installed Firefox 4 today to replace it. It looks a lot better than 3 was, and once I installed a plugin to make the address bar like Chrome (I can’t live without searching in the address bar anymore. It immediately pissed me off and I immediately started searching for plugins.), it seems like it will serve me well. Still, I already miss the way Flock would, very slightly, misrender my website, and the way it would fake out not saving my open tabs on a crash, then suddenly restore them. God speed, little browser. Rest in peace.

I’m all like, “Shit, I want to play more games on this expensive tablet I bought for games.” So I went looking for an excuse to buy a game. Hot Springs Story was on sale. Thus, I bought it.

As you might guess from the name, Hot Springs Story is another simulation game from the people who made the obscenely amazing Game Dev Story. Thus, when you look at the game, it looks pretty well exactly the same, and controls similarly, too. That’s a good thing, but it does force comparisons to the previous game, so I figure I’ll start there.

Game Dev Story is a much more fun premise to a western audience, I think. Running a Hot Springs Resort is fun enough, but not nearly as fun as creating your own ridiculously-named video games. With just a silly name on your games that you come up with, you really get to own your experience a bit more in Game Dev Story, and reliving the history of gaming, as consoles come out, is just a lot of fun.
That said, Game Dev Story was very static. Your office was your office. Hot Springs Story lets you build your facilities more like other sim games on PC. I don’t have a huge history with these games, but it reminds me of my short time with Roller Coaster Tycoon, where you are laying out facilities in a way to make customers walk past them, use them, and enjoy them. It feels like you are doing more in Hot Springs Story. I suppose that’s the main difference between the two games. Game Dev Story has a cooler premise and more ownership, while Hot Springs Story has meatier mechanics.

There are two main stats that every facility has in Hot Springs Story: Price and Popularity. Popularity rates how many people want to use your facilities, while Price rates how much money you get when they get used. Obviously, raising either raises your profits. Popularity can go up by placing other facilities near a place that work together. For example, putting a pachinko machine next to a hotel room is a bad idea, because it is very noisy and bothers your guests. However, putting a beautiful tree to give the room a better view, or a vending machine to have easy access to soda and snacks, makes the popularity of a hotel room go up. Price can go up by purchasing enhancement items. Buy some green tea to stock in your Vending Machine, and you can charge a premium for it, raising the price.

Similarly, your guests fall into many different categories, and want different things. Older customers like having easy access to a massage chair, while students enjoy access to a manga library to relax and read at. Every time a customer type is happy, they earn “XP.” Whenever a type of customer levels up, that type of customer is more likely to come and stay at your resort, and will bring more money to spend on extra activities, like eating at your restaurants. Some customer types must be unlocked by investing in local facilities outside of your resort. For example, if you want hikers to come and stay at your resort, you need to fund the city putting in a local hiking trail. (In a nice easter egg, you can even fund a local Game Development studio, and bring in programmers from Game Dev Story.) There are even VIP guests that you will have to impress to unlock new facilities. Impress the famous Beautician, for example, and she’ll let you open a branch of her famous Salon and Spa in your resort.

What I really think is the best part of the game, though, and gives it some legs, are the various tourism guides you can apply to. These work almost like special scenarios, and work to keep the game interesting after you’ve mastered how not to go bankrupt. Each guide prioritizes different things. For example, “Glamor Springs” caters to a female audience, so you have to adjust your resort to really please women in order to succeed there. Similarly, “Scenic Springs” wants only resorts with the best scenery, and you need to make sure your resort focuses on beauty more than function if you want to succeed there. In Game Dev Story, once you had the strategy, you had it: it was just a matter of grinding levels on your employees in order to succeed. These various guides give you alternate goals that give some replay value to the game, which is much appreciated.

While Game Dev Story is much more charming and draws you in more, Hot Springs Story really is a better game. It’s deeper, and has a level of replay value that Game Dev Story doesn’t. It’s a really fitting sequel to a great game. Game Dev Story may be the easy sell, but if you enjoy these sorts of business sim games, this is a really solid one, as far as I can tell. Give it a try.