The Blogtastic Blogfest That Is Getmeoutofthis.net!

You know what sucks?

Getting up early sucks.

It really does! Getting up at 6:15 this week to get to school, after my whole summer, has been a huge, huge pain. Really, really frustrating. Especially on top of everything else depressing that’s going on.

But you know what? I get up so early because it helps me get things done, and I have gotten shit done. Lesson plans, grading, homework, shit gets done when I get my ass out of bed. I keep it up because of that, doing it again and again. It was really hard to get out of bed this morning, but in this time I’ve filled out paperwork, answered e-mail questions from my students, took an online quiz, and wrote this blog. It’s still two hours before I really have to be up to do anything, and I have plenty more I’m going to get done in that time.

I don’t know why mornings work so well for me, but they do. They feel like time I wouldn’t have otherwise, so it doesn’t feel like I’m burning any free time. It’s partially that, and partially the fact that, since I did this to myself, I might as well get some reward from it. I’m already out of bed. I might as well do something.

But yeah, mornings. Hi. Been awhile. Let’s work together this semester, shall we?

How’ve you been doing?

I’ve been doing pretty shitty, so… that’s good. I suppose.

Standing up for yourself sucks. It really, truly does. There is rarely any time when standing up for yourself makes things easier, or makes you feel good. It’s a constant battle. A constant struggle. Especially when something this huge, this big is on the line, it’s really tough.

I’ve tried to tell my parents this. I’ve tried to tell them how every dream I have for the future, everything I want requires this. I’ve tried to tell them how long this has been going on, and how much it means to me. I tried doing it by being soft, by being gentle. But they wouldn’t get it.

So I put my foot down on Monday.

There were a lot of tears, and a lot of “you didn’t warn me” talk, which is silly because they’ve known this stuff for years. I only exploded once, and that was because Mom’s talking about me as if I was going to be dead after this really made me angry because it really hurt. I did my best to not waffle. I remade my points again and again. I didn’t let them tell me things that weren’t the truth, because I know the truth about me. I’m me. I know why I’m doing these things, and I know how I feel. How do I feel? Shitty. Really shitty. What’s the solution? To deal with my problems, not to hide from them. Especially not to hide from them for my parents’ sake.

I love them both so much. This is really, really fucking hard. To listen to my Mom beg for “just one more year, just one more thing to be proud of” like she will never have anything to be proud of ever again… it hurts. A lot.

The good things that have come out of this is that they will be talking to my psychiatrist soon, like they should have months ago. In addition, my dad said he was trying. Nearly in tears, he told me he was trying to understand. Trying to figure out how to help me. That made me sob. That meant so, so much to me. I don’t expect them to just get it instantly… but that he’s trying… that’s important. That’s meaningful.

Anyway, I have a class to teach, somehow… I’m going to try not to be super-depressed. I’m going to try to keep functioning. Have so far, even if it’s been a bit robotic. I’m going to get things done…

Dammit…

Brer really wanted to watch Batman: Under The Red Hood. He said it was good, and he wanted to see it. So I said I’d watch it with him, so he saved it. And then I stalled for weeks not wanting to watch it, because I’m awesome. Then, last Sunday, we finally watched it.

So how was it?
Eh, it was okay.

Apparently this is based off of a really famous story in the comic books, and it really kind of shows. The story itself is just all kinds of fan service for very rare characters in the Batman universe. People show up just because. It tries to do flashbacks, and has a few very awkward pieces of exposition, in order to catch people like me up, but it only kind of works. As someone who had only really known Batman through the animated series and Batman Beyond, it wasn’t particularly easy to follow.

Luckily, though, I have very vague knowledge of Batman history, and a boyfriend who will lecture on anything, so I was taught the important information, and could follow the narrative. What’s there, though, is both good… and also just kind of indicative of how stupid comic books are. The story is a basic, and strong one, based around Batman confronting another element of his past, but it’s tied up in so much shit. The Joker is there, because the Joker must be in everything. Ra’s Al Ghul is involved, just because. None of this is important to the actual character stuff, which is the core of the narrative. It’s just there because it’s a comic book, and continuity, and bleh.

This stuff comes with the territory, though, and if you can accept it, it’s pretty good. There’s some solid fights, and some solid confrontations. One must applaud John DiMaggio for taking up the shoes of being Joker’s voice actor. It’s hard to follow up Mark Hammil’s near-perfect version of the Joker, but he brings a very nice voice to it. Much more “cold-blooded murder” than “crazy person,” and I think it works very well. He gets extra props.

In any case, yeah, it’s a movie based on a comic book. The animation is fine. The voices are fine. The story is… comic book. I enjoyed myself, but I have no need to see it again. If you were thinking of watching it, go ahead. You’ll enjoy it. But it’s not something to sell to non-fans. You know if you’d like this before you actually watch it. That’s just how it is.

On Saturday, I played like 6 hours of Dokapon Kingdom.

Dokapon has always been a game I was excited to really get into. However, it’s not a game for everyone. It takes awhile to really get running, and it’s really a commitment. Many of the friends I’ve attempted to play it with really didn’t enjoy the slow beginning game, and we gave up on it after an hour.

However, on Saturday, Cole and Cara came over, and wanted to play a game. I didn’t really have anything new (I was hoping that Modnation Racers would show up before then, but it didn’t) and I knew that Cara had enjoyed Dokapon in the past, so I suggested we play it.

Cole loved it, and we ended up playing all day.

As we did that, I got a glimpse of how this game really works. It is a game all about the trash-talking. The majority of the fun came from me doing things like sniping people, giving them stupid names, and then constantly reminding them that they have a stupid name. That is what elevated the game from the basic thing on the screen to a competition that was serious and fun.

On top of that, the combat in the game really switched up as it progressed. As you level up, you can really specialize, and do much more in combat than just pick “Attack” or “Strike.” Cole, for example, was doing crazy things by restricting enemy’s actions, while I was just brute-forcing it as a Warrior and Cara was attempting to steal from every monster. I was surprised how it actually managed to keep itself fairly fresh, and also give you more and more control over what you were doing as the game went on.

We stopped for the night after Cara had a rampage of evil. She wasn’t doing very good, so she got a bat over her head, which the game called a “Spirit of Revenge.” I looked up what this was, and apparently this enabled Cara to sell her soul and become a “Darkling” for two game weeks and utterly destroy everything. So I told her this. And she did.

And she destroyed everything.

Seriously, the Darkling is obscenely powerful. It was pretty hard to get going, and she only got the spirit of revenge when she was really behind, so it didn’t feel that broken to me. She was certainly having fun with it. It was pretty neat.

After that rampage, though, we decided we’d have enough. We’ve saved the game, though. Who knows, we may come back to it. I kind of hope we do. There’s still two continents left to explore, and so many more classes to max out with so many abilities!

Basically, I’m glad Dokapon ended up being what I thought it was when I bought it. Good, good times.

Today is the first day of school.

Fuck.

In Brer’s words, I have been “seriously depressed” all summer, and I’d mostly agree with that. As a result I don’t feel completely prepared for the semester to come. I feel like I’m stumbling forward into it.

Then again, I always feel that way when I haven’t done anything for a long while. I always feel lost until I’m in the thick of it, because it’s then that it’s not longer an unknown.

This semester should be less stressful in some ways. School should be less of a problem than it was last time. Much easier classes, and hopefully a much easier time. It should be way more stressful in others, though. Things are going to change. They’re really going to change.

They’re really going to change.

Looking at it, as always… scary as fuck. How many times have I written these words?

But I can do this. It begins. Life moves forward, and for the first fucking time, I am going to move forward. And at the end is my brother’s wedding, and all that jazz, and a visit from Brer.

I can do this. Just watch me.

I feel like this is one of those things I’m just way, way behind on, and the whole rest of the internet already knows about it, but seriously, have you read the stuff that Chris Sims does over at his Invincible Super-Blog?

I guess nowadays, he’s doing the freelance writer thing, and most of his posts are just links to stuff he wrote elsewhere, but let me tell you: the stuff he wrote elsewhere is excellent, as well as the stuff on the blog itself. I basically barreled through an entire year of posts the other day, and was laughing a large amount of the time. It started with me learning about the AMAZING WONDER that is Tarot: Witch of the Black Rose, and skyrocketed from there, with me reading in-depth analysis of gender-swapped pinup fanart and Wonder Woman’s new costume and so on. (As a side note, I had heard about this costume change, but hadn’t seen it before that article, and I have to admit, it looks really good. More practical and less stupid. I don’t know why people were bitching.) It’s all really good reads. He’s a very funny guy (and it seems like his fellow writers at ComicsAlliance are too) and you should enjoy his stuff.

It always puts me in a weird situation when I read something like this. I mean, I know ABOUT comics, but I don’t know comics. I’m not a comics person. It’s always interesting to dive deep into a fandom I’m not a part of and see how very similar it is to what I am about and also how different. I know just enough to get the jokes, but I’m also learning. It’s a learning experience! So that’s nice.

Anyway, Chris Sims. Cool dude who actually responded with a thanks to my twitter thanks. Cool dude. The end.

Have you heard about Catherine?

Basically, the people behind P3, including such awesome individuals as Shoji Meguro, are making a game for 306 and PS3. It’s supposed to be an action game, and it’s supposed to be “adult” and “erotic.”

And they’ve put out a trailer.

Frankly, I think the game looks fantastic. Little is known, besides that it is an “Action” game, but I have a lot of faith in this team.

While weird and backwards in a lot of ways, Persona 3, 4, and other SMT games have always been very mature in many ways. They tackle interesting issues, and have actually interesting plots. They’re not perfect, of course (Example: Their treatment of Kanji in Persona 4) but they understand they’re writing for a mostly adult audience and they make that work. The problem has always been, in my eyes, that using high schoolers again and again, they’re kept from really tackling more deep subjects. From the moment I played Persona 3, I wanted to play a game like that as an adult, with adult issues and juggling adult schedules. I wanted that very much.

Now, I don’t think this is going to be exactly that. It’s not a Persona game. But it already has the elements. A dream nightmare world where most of the gameplay will probably take place. A real world with obvious elements of at least dating this Catherine character, if nothing else. This could be what I wanted. On top of that, it’s dealing with a very deep subject, one I’ve worked with myself. Sexuality has plenty of interesting ways it could be used in a game like this, and I hope that this game isn’t shy about exploring them.

Again, there are potential worries. Will they be mature enough to make an actual game? Will they treat the subject matter in the right way? Only time will tell. I have optimism, though. Gamers have grown up. Games should grow up in this way, too.

I’m sure I’ll buy it day 1.

Okay, so. I figured out why I don’t like Flipflip.

My brother’s dog, Flapjack, is not an evil dog. He is not filled with evil feelings and such. He’s super-hyper, of course, as rat terriers tend to be, and that is kind of annoying. He also nips at me whenever I try to pet him. He also kicked me in the face and bloodied my lip. But he’s a dog, none of that is really serious.

It’s how mean he is to Molly, my Mom’s dog.

Now, I like Molly. I always say hi to her, pet her, and such. She’s pretty weird sometimes. Very picky about things. But she’s a nice dog.

Flapjack is being over here because Jonathan, Shauna, and Spantsinton are off doing their thing in Chicago. He runs around like a madman, and whenever I try to pet Molly, he will seriously climb on top of her, knock her over, and otherwise beat on her and make her growl and bite at him in anger, just to get me not to pay attention to her. This is so rude, and a complete dick move! And I do pet him, and say hi. At least, when he’s not trying to bite me. It’s not like I’m ignoring him.

That’s what makes me not like him. He’s keeping me from doing something I want to do, namely pet my dog. Everything else I can write off as being dog things. Hell, even him peeing everywhere when he’s nervous. He’s an animal, and that shit happens. But it’s just how he’s consciously keeping me from spending time with my dog. On purpose, stopping me. That’s what makes me unhappy.

But he’s still here all weekend! Oh well, my parents will take care of him. And I will do lesson plans. Joy of joys.

Monday Night Combat isn’t just for Monday. It’s for everyday.

Seriously, it’s been a long time since I have played a purely multiplayer experience so polished and perfected. Monday Night Combat is a complete blast, and if you enjoy shooters on the lines and play them on the 360, you have to get this game.

The design of the game is different, but completely awesome. Basically, it’s Defense of the Ancients meets TF2. You spawn minions at both sides, and they move towards your opponents base. You pick one of several classes, such as Support, Sniper, or Gunner, and help push the bots forward to destroy your enemy’s “Moneyball.” You gain money while you kill things, which you use to upgrade your dude, build turmulents, activate traps, and summon additional bots.

What this creates is a setting where, like in DotA to some extent, you can be a huge help without directly affecting the other players. Granted, killing the other team gives you huge advantages, of course, since they are the best defenders. But you can be useful just by keeping turmulents up and going and taking out harder-to-kill bots. It’s objective-based multiplayer at it’s best. In addition, because there are all the bots, when you get into a match where the other team is more skilled than you, it keeps you from dying constantly, because there are other things to shoot at. Avoiding the “Spawn, oh I’m dead” cycle that can happen so often is really appealing.

Apparently the demo lets you play the game online for half an hour. Do that. You’ll know whether or not this is a game for you in that time. But it bet it will be. Because it is simply a blast. I played it pretty well nonstop the few days after it came out, with people and without, and it was fun as hell either way. I want this game on PC, too, so I can buy it again. I love it. The end.

Sin and Punishment: Star Successor is not near as fun as the BDSM romp it could have been. Instead, it’s a crazy shooter based on an N64 game that never came to America! Isn’t that fantastic?

Star Successor is a Treasure game, so I knew what I was getting into: balls to the walls shooter action that was way, way too difficult for me. This is why I gamefly’d it, of course. I can’t enjoy these sorts of games for a long period of time, but I figured it would be a good afternoon of fun. So I set it to easy, and picked the girl who automagically locks on to people, and went for it.

First off, I have to applaud this game for giving me the option of using my Classic Controller Pro. It’s pretty clearly the sub-optimal control vector, as being able to flip my cursor around the screen faster would have been to my advantage in most situations. However, I hate pointing the wiimote at the screen SO, SO MUCH that I really appreciated being able to control it like the old game.
I also appreciated the Easy mode and the auto-lock girl. It made the game much more accessible. With those settings, with practice, I probably could have beaten the thing. Of course, I don’t want to practice, but it’s the thought that counts. The auto lock was nice, as once you started firing on something, you no longer had to aim until you destroyed it. Granted, this could get you into trouble at times, where you want to kill a few little dudes in the middle of killing a big dude, but overall made the game easier. I’m sure hardcore players, who this game is made for, will never, ever use the girl. But I appreciated it.

Seriously, though, this game is insane. It looks very pretty, though very anime, and the huge bosses in this game are just mind-blowing. Early on, you face this screen-filling giant turtle for no real reason, and it really is a fantastic fight. I later fought some magician dude who had like 6 forms, each more crazy than the last. (Okay, the last was, like, a dolphin. So that wasn’t too crazy. The others were, though!) It seems like it’s delivering on exactly what a Treasure fan would want, and I appreciate it for that.

However, this game is fantastically, amazingly niche. People just don’t do shmups anymore, except the super-hardcore. Thinking back to how Nintendo was marketing this as “No, really, we care about the hardcore!” it’s really kind of sad. It doesn’t do what Nintendo was wanting. However, it’s not hiding what it is. If you think you’d like Star Successor, you probably will. It’s well done. It’s just a kind of arcade, completely hardcore game that I just can’t play for long periods of time anymore.